A Delicious Mistake Page 13

  She opened her eyes and held Benjamin’s gaze, her fingertips digging into his shoulder blades as they reached their highest peak together. It felt like she was being caught up in a solar flare and an eclipse at the same time—an improbable and very real merging of light and dark, a blend of feelings and sensations that ripping into her body and his, and into their souls.

  Then silence held her as they both lay, spent and sated, resting in each other’s arms. Sarah breathed her way through the afterglow, holding Benjamin close.

  Benjamin lay half on top of her now. After what felt like an eternity he finally moved to gently slide out of her. He reached up to lightly cup Sarah’s face in his large hands. He stared at her and smiled.

  Sarah smiled back. Something was definitely up with her love, and she had no idea what it could be. Still, she had the feeling it would be a good thing.

  “Well?” she demanded. “Are you ever going to tell me what has gotten into you?”

  He smiled, and the expression widened to a grin. But his face softened as he traced her lips and the features of her face with his thumb. “Before dawn, while you slept, I have been to visit with the Sangoma.”

  Sarah nodded. The Sangoma was a traditional healer. Benjamin and other Masaai would often seek out his council. “And…?” she prompted.

  Benjamin beamed at her. “You’re with child,” he declared proudly. “The Sangoma has told me today on the plains.”

  Sarah stared at him. She let the words sink in, but then realized they didn’t really need to sink at all. It really wasn’t a surprise to her. “I think I knew,” she said quietly. Events of the past couple of weeks crowded her. Thoughts. Sensations. Morning sickness. And most of all, that one moment of knowing. “Aside from the nausea, I think I felt it.”

  She could even pinpoint the exact moment. Three weeks prior, during one of their fiery lovemaking sessions, Sarah had indeed felt something. She hadn’t been able to give a name to that shift she had perceived for just one moment. It had made the hair at the base of her neck stand up. But now she knew. She knew the moment when her baby had been conceived and she had a life growing inside her.

  She had also felt something else.

  “What?” Benjamin asked now, staring intently at her. She knew that he could see something was on her mind and that some thoughts lingered there, unexpressed. He had gotten uncannily good at reading into her. “What is it, Sarah?”

  “You’ll laugh at me,” she said, blushing and turning her head away.

  “I won’t.” Reaching out, he cupped her chin and gently turned her back to face him. “You know I won’t.”

  Sarah stared at him, somewhat warily. Finally she decided to just say it. She was making progress with what she called trust issues. She had discovered it wasn’t just a matter of Benjamin being a suspect in her brother’s murderer. Sarah did not trust. Period. She had been raised to be careful—with her father’s life and with her own emotions.

  But she was learning to let Benjamin in, slowly but surely.

  She took a deep breath. “I felt it when we conceived this baby.”

  “Of course you did.” Benjamin stroked her stomach. “Why would I laugh at you? A woman knows.”

  “There’s more.” Sarah glared at him, somewhat put out that he had cut her off before she could find the courage to express the whole concept.

  “Oh?” Benjamin gave her an amused smile. “Sorry.”

  Sarah took another deep breath and forced the words out. “I was…no, I am sure… this baby is a gift from Luke.”

  Benjamin stared at her. As always whenever her brother’s name was mentioned, his eyes darkened. He missed Luke terribly, she knew, perhaps even more than she did. As an adult, he had spent far more time with Luke than she had. And she wished at times she could give him back just one more day with Luke at his side.

  “Why would I laugh at you?” Benjamin asked.

  Sarah shrugged. “Don’t you think it’s a little…weird?”

  “No.” He shook his head. He smiled and the dark cloud lifted a little from his face. “I think it is fitting. It’s something that Luke would do.”

  Sarah had to laugh. The pang brought on by her own lingering sorrow from her brother’s death dissipated somewhat. “I want to call him Luke,” she said firmly.

  Benjamin was nodding even before she had finished the sentence. “There is no other name for him.”

  Sarah smiled.

  After a few long, quiet minutes passed, Benjamin whispered, “A life for a life.”

  He was clearly talking more to himself than to her, but Sarah heard him. She looked down to where Benjamin rested his head on her shoulder. “What did you say?”

  Benjamin looked up. “I said, a life for a life.”

  Sarah frowned. “What does that mean?”

  “It means balance.” Benjamin clearly chose his next words carefully. “My people believe the Serengeti is filled with balance. Nature is balanced. It takes, but it also gives. It saves and it kills. It nourishes and it starves.” He paused. “Luke died,” he said quietly, as if it still hurt to utter the words out loud. “But eight weeks later, a life is created. Balance. A life for a life.”

  Sarah mulled over the notion. Benjamin lay back down, settling his head on her shoulder again and burying his face in the crook of her neck.

  A life for a life. She wasn’t sure she liked the concept. She had never been a fan of the whole “everything happens for a reason” philosophy. But over the past eight weeks Tanzania, and most of all, the Serengeti had taught that maybe, just maybe, the time had come for her to re-evaluate her concepts. Perhaps there had been no agenda of fate or destiny in Luke’s death. But it was undeniable that if the tragedy not happened she and Benjamin would never have met again and fallen in love.

  None of this meant that she was happy about her brother’s death, of course. All it meant was that what had come out of a tragic situation hadn’t been all tragic.

  Balance.

  Perhaps she would have come to back to Tanzania one day, eventually. Perhaps she would have finally accepted one of her brother’s many invitations. Sooner or later. But she was pretty sure she wouldn’t have been so fatally and hopelessly attracted to Benjamin Ndlovo. With Luke around, even as adults, she would have still seen the gorgeous African man as nothing more than her brother’s friend and loyal companion. With Luke around, Benjamin might still have looked at her and seen nothing more than his best friend’s little sister.

  With Luke around…

  She missed Luke. She missed him terribly and fiercely. The pain had receded, but it was never going to go away. It just changed forms. It was something she was learning to live with. She thought that whoever had said that time heals everything had clearly never known real suffering. Lucky them. Time would never heal the pain of the loss of her big brother. But it could help her learn to cope.

  This child, this baby, this life growing in her belly could and would help her learn to cope, too. This child was Luke’s gift and his way of letting her know that life did go on. And it was still utterly, breathtakingly beautiful.

  Just like the man lying in her arms right now.

  Overwhelmed by the enormity of her thoughts, Sarah tightened her hold on Benjamin and pulled him even closer. She kissed his temple—lovingly, reverently.

  She took one of his large and gentle hands and placed it upon her belly, resting her palm upon his. She smiled, truly serene for the very first time in a long time. “A life for a life.”

  Next to her, Benjamin murmured, “Yes, my love.”

  THE END

 

 

 
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